Self-Assertion as a Success Factor

Many a well educated man of good address and ability fails to win a satisfactory position in life because he lacks self-assertion. He has a shrinking nature and abhors publicity; the thought of pushing himself forward is repugnant to him, and so he is left behind in the race by the hustling, stirring, vigorous people around him, many of whom do not possess one-tenth of his ability or natural advantages.

Many young people have a totally mistaken conception of the meaning of healthy aggressiveness. They frequently confound it with egotistic boastfulness, decry it as a lack of modesty, and consider it the sign of petty, vulgar soul.

They think it unbecoming to try to make a good impression in regard to their own ability, and shrink from public gaze, believing that, if they work hard, even in retirement, they will come out all right.

As a matter of fact, however, in this competitive age, it is not only indispensable to have our mental storehouses well stocked with superior goods, but it is also necessary to advertise them, for even an inferior article, if well advertised, will often sell rapidly, while a superior one without advertisement will sell at a dead loss.

No one sympathizes with the blatant, conceited, over-confident youth who has the list of his accomplishments and virtues at his tongue's end, and inflicts them on any one he can induce to listen. He is the very opposite of the unassuming young man, who, while conscious of his power, makes no parade of it, but simply carries himself as if he knew his business thoroughly.

When questioned as to what he can do, a modesty self-assertive person does not give weak, hesitating answers, saying, I think I can do that, or Perhaps I could do it, creating a feeling of doubt not only in his own mind but also in that of his questioner, which undoubtedly acts to his disadvantage. He knows he can do certain things, and he says so with a confidence that carries conviction.

This is the sort of self-assertion or self- confidence that young men and women must cultivate if they would raise themselves to their full value. It is a quality as far removed from vulgar, shallow self-conceit as the calm exercise of conscious power is from charlatanism.

Thousands of young men and young women are occupying inferior positions today because of their over-humility, so to speak, or fear of seeming to put themselves for- ward. Many of them are conscious that they are much abler than the superintendents or managers over them, and are consequently dissatisfied, feeling that an injustice has been done them, because they have been passed over in favor of more aggressive workers.

But they have only themselves to blame. They have been too modest to assert themselves or to assume responsibility when occasion has warranted, thinking that , in time their real ability would be discovered by their employers, and that they would be advanced accordingly.

But a young man with virtue self-confidence, who courts responsibility, will attract the attention of those above him, and will be promoted when a retiring, self-effacing, but much abler youth who worked beside him is passed by.

It is useless to say that merit ought to win under any circumstances the fact remains that there is very little chance for a young man, no matter what his ability, to forge ahead, if he lacks a just appreciation of himself and is destitute of that conscious- ness of power and willingness to assume responsibility which impresses his personality on others and opens the door to recognition of his merit.

" Tis true, 'tis pity, and pity 'tis, 'tis true" that modest worth that retires from the pub lie gaze and works in secret, waiting to be discovered and to have prizes thrust upon it, waits in vain. The world moves too fast in this twentieth century to turn aside to seek out shrinking ability. We must all go to the world.

We need not delude ourselves with the idea that it will come to us, no matter how able or meritorious we may be. While actual inability can never hope to hold its own, even though, through self-conceit and aggressive methods, it may succeed in pushing its way ahead for a time, it is equally true that shrinking, self-effacing ability rarely comes to its own.